Conversion of St. Paul
Benjamin West, 1786
My dear friends,
On this Third Sunday of Easter, the light of Christ Risen illuminates for us the mysterious and transformative journey of Saul, whose conversion reflects not only a personal turning, but the universal call of the Bodhisattva path: to let go of the self clinging to delusion and arise as one whose life is shaped by awakened compassion. Saul's journey to Damascus becomes a metaphor for the spiritual path, where aggression is turned into loving-kindness, and ignorance into wisdom.
still breathing threats and murder
against the disciples of the Lord,
went to the high priest
and asked him for letters
to the synagogues at Damascus,
so that if he found any
who belonged to the Way, men or women,
he might bring them bound to Jerusalem.
- Acts 9:1-2
Here we see Saul as the archetype of the deluded mind, clinging to a fixed identity and projecting hatred onto others. Just as in the teachings of the lojong mind-training, we are reminded that those whom we consider enemies can be our greatest teachers. Saul's spiritual blindness, his inability to see the disciples as fellow seekers, is the ignorance that needs to be transformed.
suddenly a light from heaven flashed around him.
He fell to the ground and heard a voice saying to him, "Saul, Saul, why do you persecute me?"
He asked, "Who are you, Lord?" The reply came, "I am Jesus, whom you are persecuting.
But get up and enter the city, and you will be told what you are to do."
- Acts 9:3-6
The light from heaven, like the moment of insight in meditation, breaks the ordinary pattern of mind. Saul is undone by this direct encounter with the Living Christ, just as we may be shocked into transformation by the recognition of our own harmful attitudes and actions.
- Acts 9:7
To hear but not see: This, too, reflects our condition in the early stages of the path. We may hear the teachings, but without the inner eye of wisdom opened by practice, they remain external. Saul's companions are mirrors for our own incomplete perception, inviting us to move beyond mere belief to realization.
and though his eyes were open, he could see nothing;
so they led him by the hand and brought him into Damascus.
For three days he was without sight and neither ate nor drank.
- Acts 9:8-9
In these three days of blindness, Saul is stripped of all identity, attachments, and conceptual grasping. He undergoes what the saints and yogis call a "death before death." As Saul, renamed as the Apostle Paul, will later say: "I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me." These days symbolize the gestation of a new being in the womb of emptiness. Here we see a direct parallel with the three days Christ spent in the tomb; both are a passage through death into new life. As Christ rose in the power of the Spirit, so too will Saul be led into new vision and power.
The Lord said to him in a vision, "Ananias." He answered, "Here I am, Lord."
The Lord said to him, "Get up and go to the street called Straight,
and at the house of Judas look for a man of Tarsus named Saul.
At this moment he is praying, and he has seen in a vision a man named Ananias come in
and lay his hands on him so that he might regain his sight."
But Ananias answered, "Lord, I have heard from many about this man,
how much evil he has done to your saints in Jerusalem,
and here he has authority from the chief priests to bind all who invoke your name."
- Acts 9:10-14
Ananias' hesitation reveals the human difficulty in seeing others as changeable. But the bodhisattva path demands trust in the potential of all beings to awaken. Ananias, like the Kalyāṇa-mittatā ("spiritual friend"), becomes the compassionate presence that helps Saul emerge from darkness. His willingness to act despite fear exemplifies true spiritual courage.
to bring my name before gentiles and kings and before the people of Israel;
I myself will show him how much he must suffer for the sake of my name."
- Acts 9:15-16
This declaration echoes the Bodhisattva vow to embrace suffering for the liberation of others. Saul's new role is not of power, but of service, shaped by the transformative understanding of suffering as a vehicle for compassion. His mission is born of surrender, not ambition.
"Brother Saul, the Lord Jesus, who appeared to you on your way here,
has sent me so that you may regain your sight and be filled with the Holy Spirit."
And immediately something like scales fell from his eyes, and his sight was restored.
Then he got up and was baptized, and after taking some food, he regained his strength.
- Acts 9:17-19a
The falling of the scales is the moment of prajñā, direct insight into the truth. Saul's new vision is not just of the eyes but of the heart. He is filled with the Holy Spirit of Bodhicitta, the "Awakening Mind" of love, compassion, and wisdom.
and immediately he began to proclaim Jesus in the synagogues,
saying, "He is the Son of God."
- Acts 9:19b-20
The fruit of awakening is the natural compassion to benefit others. Saul becomes Paul, and his proclamation arises not from obligation but realization. He has become one with the Way he once persecuted. Truly, he has been transformed by the renewing of his mind, a mind not conformed to the world but led by love.
May we, too, be struck by light and led by love. May the scales fall from our eyes, and the mind of Christ be born within us.